Since It's Almost Over...

President Bush's Legacy: One of Our Greatest Presidents

[via Jon Swift]

Ambitious Bit

I have mixed feelings about President-elect Obama’s selection of Rick Warren to deliver the invocation at his inauguration in January.

On the one hand, liberals are throwing a hissy fit, which is always nice (though I continue to pray for their ultimate salvation, of course). And it’s good to see a fellow Southern Baptist pastor receive such public validation, especially when he has recently jumped aboard the anti-gay marriage bandwagon.

On the other hand, I fear that Warren, who is a bit of a Pollyanna, will blow this opportunity to aggressively promote the evangelical agenda.

Any preacher worth his salt knows that an invocation is not really a prayer—it is a chance to tell God things He already knows as a means of educating your listeners on right-thinking values. And Warren will have a boatload of listeners to educate come January 20th! So here is a suggested “prayer” that I will be passing along to Rick: {continue...}

[via Reverend Right`s Blog]

Failed to Report?

No matter what happens in this year’s election, the conservative blogosphere deserves to win a collective Pulitzer Prize for its election-year coverage. While the mainstream media has given Americans a very distorted picture of Barack Obama, portraying him as a thoughtful, intelligent, unflappable, decent family man who has the temperament and judgment to be President, the conservative blogosphere has been the only place where you can get the real story. Hampered by quaint, old-fashioned rules of journalism that require citing evidence and reputable sources, the mainstream media has failed to report a number of important stories about Obama and the conservative blogosphere has had to step up and do the media’s job for them. As a public service I have collected some of the most important of these stories in one place. Pulitzer Prize judges, take note! {continue...}

[via Jon Swift, HT: Abandoned Stuff by Saskboy]

Religious Order Continues to Blend In, Make No Real Difference in Community

[via catholicnews.org]

Trying to Leave Behind...

How to Handle a Stalker

You meet someone at a dinner party in a city far from home. He seems pleasant, normal enough. You depart on friendly terms, telling him to give you a call if he's ever in your part of the country.

The next morning you learn that he has booked a flight to your city. More than that, he has booked a seat on the very same flight you are taking home and, telling the airline that he is your traveling companion, has arranged for the seat next to yours. What should you do? How should you handle this aggressive, frightening development and this man's increasingly disturbing advances?

In this educational filmstrip, we'll watch as our young subject -- let's call her "Chloe" -- attempts a variety of strategies for coping with her stalker. We'll call him "Buck."

Boop. Please advance the filmstrip now. {continue...}

[via slacktivist]

2008 Resolutions of the Televangelists

[via The Wittenburg Door]

Man protests commercialized Christmas by crucifying Santa - literally

[via N.Y. Daily News]

Protesters picket 'Living Negativity Scene'

[via Wittenburg Blog]

Woman Delivered From Christmas Spirit

[via The Wittenburg Door]

Powered by ScribeFire.

Santa Stranglings...

Wittenburg Door #214

In this issue:

Interviews: Rolf Potts and Phyllis Tickle

Also featuring articles such as:

"They'll Know We are Christians by Our Stuff"
The Exegete: Harmonizing the Gospels for Dummies
Vision Statements You're Not Likely to See
Jesus Weary of Being Lifted Higher
Goin' Straight: Notes from Ted Haggard's Support Group
St. Christopher Relieved from Duty
A James Dobson Emergency Alert: The Newest Threat to American Families
Reading Lolita at Liberty University

and more. The Last Word: Santa, Yule, and Me

"The 'test of faith' card again?"

From Crackle: Mr. Deity and the Meaning - Season 2, Ep 2

[via Mr. Deity]

In the "Not Making This Up" Category:

The Unicorn Museum

[via The Wittenburg Door Insider]

What Should I Be Learning Again?

Grade-Fixing Scandal Rocks Vacation Bible School

[via The Wittenburg Door Insider Newsletter]

Vacation Bible Schools Your Child Should Skip

[via Loud Time, HT: ThinkChristian.Net]

He: "Oh my goodness, I can't believe you would do this to me!"
She: "You really need to grow up!"

Bye Bye Baby Home De-birthing Kit

[via Think Christian]

Deflecting Attention Away

I tuned in to watch the Republican presidential candidates debate last night, because I'd seen a disturbing report about Mitt Romney.

Bill Keller, a St. Petersburg, Fla., evangelist declared on his website, "If you vote for Mitt Romney you are voting for Satan." If Romney, a Mormon, becomes president, he said, it would "lead millions of souls to the eternal flames of hell."

Keller bills himself as the "Dr. Phil of Prayer" and "the next big thing in mass media religion." Howard Stern calls the guy up to have him on his radio show. Keller's ministry brings in more than $2 million annually. Now his TV show is on the i Network (formerly PAX).

So I tuned in, just in case Keller knew something no one else did. But I didn't see anything evil about Mitt Romney--at least not any more evil than the rest of the politicos.

That's when I decided to find out some more about Keller himself. Could this man be the Antichrist? {continue}

[via The Wittenburg Blog]

Driscoll Video Provides Surprising Products

Uniform Message Creates Wide Distribution

Pastor Bill Hybels may believe women have spiritual gifts, but Pastor Mark Driscoll of Mars Hill Church spawns material ones primarily for men. A video which features Driscoll discussing church planting was played at the 2007 National New Church Conference, with the intention of being widely distributed later. However, this objective was not achieved, with Driscoll's blog suggesting that the organizers were "not wanting a bigger fuss" because of alleged controversial material. The pertinent video called "The Good Soldier" was then placed on YouTube.

As the blogosphere became abuzz with activity over this, many have tried to relate to Driscoll's message. Interest in Jesus action figures has doubled, especially those that include a weapon or have a soldier's uniform. A Jesus who appears in a dress, suggestive of a gay hippie are in development, says Randall Armstrong, CEO of Lame Christian Men. They will likely be modelled after Rob Bell and Joel Osteen, mainly aimed at the secure Christian male demographic, he said.

Driscoll dolls are also becoming popular, particularly among women. Retailers point out that they are definitely amused, possibly because of the comfort stemming from owning and playing with the toys. One option makes Driscoll utter memorable quotes, such as "men is the most important variable", which usually puts a foot into the doll's mouth. This does not seem to be a malfunction, the manufacturer notes, but it has not apparently happened enough to investigate further or consider it unsafe. (There is a warning on the package as a precaution, however.) The toys also have an open hand and a closed fist normally, but unfortunately nothing for scissors.

Some want to identify with the message through song. The punk band Reform Revolution will release their debut album "Prom Songs" in June to correspond with Graduation ceremonies. According to the lead singer, Jezebel Machoan, the band wants everyone to embrace the mission of Pastor Mark, empowering half of humanity for the benefit of all. The album includes the singles "In The Rear Until They Fear (The Lord)", "Miss Understood", "Win The Men, Win The War" and "Rockin' To The Spice Girls". They plan to tour this fall to wimpy cities across America.

Others need a more sensual experience to get into the mission of resonating with Driscoll. Victwares, a company specializing in "embodying potent ministry", has anything from herbal tea to pump you up to aromatherapy treatments that gently remove any sense of perspective. Their most popular product, Servitude, supposedly helps women to avoid nasty headaches and gain a servant's heart when their men need their regular requirement of intimacy. The instructions state that it is best used at least once daily, although some women dispute the effects.

The Acts 29 Network has cautiously supported these efforts, hoping they can compensate for any lost impact and mixed reviews of Pastor Mark Driscoll at this point. Many men and some women expect this to create common ground, considering the regular frustration and defensiveness associated with Driscoll's teaching. Not all are as optimistic and characterize this as a distraction from the real issues involved. However, it is evident that Driscoll's consistent branding has encouraged a broad range of responses that entertain while complicated.

Spoiling a Bad Day?

Good laugh for Good Friday

[via grrl meets world]

"No, the health plan does not cover crucifixion!"



[via mr. deity]

Seriously? Repentance?

We have tweaked our friend the Rev. James Dobson pretty regularly in the past, particular for his involvement in politics. And when Dr. Dobson called for the resignation of the Rev. Richard Cizik, president for the National Association of Evangelicals, because he believed that Cizik was spending too much time worrying about global warming and not enough time spent on “core” Religious Right issues, such as abortion and same-sex marriages, we gigged him pretty hard then, too.

However, we received this e-mail this morning from Dobson’s Focus on the Family ministry and we think it is a remarkable document. It is probably the most honest, most revealing statement ever made by the normally carefully controlled Dobson.

So, in the spirit of Christian reconciliation, we’re making available Dr. Dobson’s complete statement, without editorial comment.

{read the rest}

[via The Wittenburg Blog]

"I'm starting to not totally believe part of this"

[via RockTV. Thanks Eric from the Wittenburg Door Chat Closet.]

The Elect Gene?

March 19, 2007

Joe Bob Briggs
Door Science Correspondent

After several years of research, scientists at the Clinical Molecular Genetics Laboratory at the Universidad Nacional Autonoma de Mexico have isolated three genes that are believed to prove a biological basis for becoming a practicing Southern Baptist.

"We were stunned," said Jose Aguilar de la Estacionamiento, Director of Basic Research at the university, at a morning press conference. "We were actually looking for the determinant gene for sphincter occlusion. It's one of those inadvertent discoveries that sometimes occur when you're doing basic science."

Aguilar said the results were so shocking that he withheld publication for two years while the DNA was taken from every member of the Iglesia Bautista Hugo Chavez mega-church in San Miguel Allende. He found a 99.7 percent correlation between the genetic makeup of the Baptists in that congregation and the presence of the three mutated genes that normally identify people with a tendency toward stiff necks, rigid sphincter muscles, and early-pattern baldness. Given the overwhelming evidence, Aguilar said, there was no choice but to announce his findings to the scientific community.

Instantly, there were ethical issues raised as Mexican Catholics besieged parish priests with questions about whether it was possible that their infants could grow up to be Baptists. {continue...}

[via The Wittenburg Door Insider, HT: The Raging Paradoxidation]